Curious Affiliations
by TealEyedBeing
Summary: Urahara meets Ichigo's dearly beloved inner Hollow when the albino has some illness, and after he's healed, the ex-captain asks some rather... embarrassingly intimate questions. Warnings/Disclaimer inside.


**Warnings/Disclaimer: **Boy!Kissing (aka yaoi) and OOCness, mildly AU and Urahara. Disclaimer is I own nothing but the plot inspired by an rp me and Tamix14 did once.

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**Someday, we'll look back on this, laugh nervously and change the subject.**

_~Unknown_

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"Umm... Urahara-san... can I ask you something?" A nervous Kurosaki Ichigo mumbled reluctantly, scuffing his sneaker clad feet a little in the dust of the training room where Urahara Kisuke was hiding from Tessai, who was trying to get the shopkeeper to try his latest "remedy". The orange haired teen wore blue jeans and a plain navy t-shirt with his hands stuffed in his pockets.

Kisuke looked up from where he sat cross legged on the rocky ground, storm gray eyes peering up at the substitute shinigami from underneath the shade of his green and white striped hat and from above his ever present white fan. "Why, but of course, Kurosaki-san, why ever would you think to ever hesitate in asking me anything?" The mischievous older man grinned broadly behind his concealing fan when Ichigo scowled.

"Uh huh, yeah, I'm gonna ignore that last statement because you know damn well why I don't trust you." The orange head grumbled, stomping closer before plopping cross legged onto the ground before the blond ex-captain with an abnormally serious expression on his attractive features. "I need your help and it's vital that you don't tell anyone else about this, got it?"

Kisuke blinked at the sudden change in demeanor of his favorite teasing subject. Whatever this problem was, the eldest Kurosaki sibling was very much serious about it. "What is this affiliation, may I ask?"

At this question, Ichigo's determination faltered slightly and he averted his bronze eyes, rubbing the back of his head nervously. "Uh, well you see, there's a... something wrong with... uh, yeah and I don't know what to do or how to fix it. Nothing else I've tried has worked so I figured it must be a Hol-something! Uh, thing that is only specifically directed at him that medicine can't fix."

Kisuke blinked at that jumbled, pathetic explanation that hardly made sense for a normal person. But, being the insane genius that he was, Urahara picked up on the implications and slip-ups with perfect clarity and deadly accuracy. "Your Hollow has caught some sort of virus?" He concluded, enjoying how Ichigo's face immediately burst into surprise at his dead-on accurate guess.

"How the hell do you always do that?" The irate orange head grumbled crossly before his expression suddenly softened into concern as his chocolate brown eyes became slightly glazed as his attention focused inwards. After a few moments, he came back down to "earth" and looked at Kisuke determinedly. "Can you help him if I let him out?"

The blond shopkeeper raised an eyebrow beneath his beloved hat. "So you trust him enough to do so? Trust me enough?" His smile turned sly behind his fan as Ichigo glared menacingly across the short distance at him.

"I trust you not to do anything to him unless you want Zangetsu shoved up your ass!" The irate teen snarled before sitting back with his arms crossed. "And yes, I trust him to behave as well, especially since he's not in top condition right now to fight." Ichigo unexpectedly winced suddenly. "Alright alright I'm sorry, geez don't get so worked up." He mumbled aloud, seemingly without realizing.

The ex-captain smirked before standing, dusting off his green themed clothes and twirling his cane between one hand's capable fingers. "Well then, Kurosaki-san, follow me and we will tend to your Hollow-san, yes?" And with those words, the shopkeeper twirled on his heels and started walking further into the training room where he kept some supplies in case Tessai kept him "trapped" down here like today.

Ichigo blinked and scrambled up to follow, still mumbling to "himself" occasionally as his Hollow apparently had some objections to Kisuke treating him for whatever malady that he had. The substitute shinigami blinked again when he was led to a small "room" behind a particularly large boulder. It had shelves carved into the rock that contained medicine and food along with a simple cot lying next to the stone structure.

"Materialize your Hollow-san please, and lay him there." Kisuke instructed, pointing to the cot with his fan as if Ichigo didn't know where he was talking about and turned towards his shelves, pulling out several instruments and devices.

The orange head did as he was asked, closing his eyes and concentrating inwards. After focusing on his albino duplicate's reitsu signature, he gently pulled and braced himself when his Hollow's weight appeared into existence in his arms.

The bleached version of Ichigo immediately protested being held bridal style and started cursing and flailing. "God dammit, King! Put me down! Put me down now, damn you! I'm not a fuckin' girl!" He shrieked hoarsely, his warbled voice yelling out more weakly than it usually would as he shoved at his King's chest in an attempt to be put down as he had ordered.

Ichigo snorted and ignored his Hollow's poor attempts to separate them. "You're sick, Shiro, stop being such a brat and let us take care of you." He said firmly as he walked forward a few steps and placed his albino counterpart on the cot gently. "Now, sit quietly, don't overexert yourself, and let Urahara-san find out what's wrong with you, you stubborn jackass."

The Hollow, apparently named Shiro, growled and let out a huff, crossing his arms over his chest mulishly and turned away from the orange haired substitute shinigami, almost pouting. Ichigo smirked and momentarily forgetting Kisuke, who was watching their interactions with curiosity and amusement, he leaned forward and pressed a kiss to the back of Shiro's neck.

The albino instantly squawked and scrambled away, blushing a bright pink. "KING!" Shiro whined petulantly. "I've toldja not t' do tha'!" The Hollow was definitely pouting very much now, embarrassed by the given affection and that Kisuke had seen it.

The teen chuckled with a rare grin and sat back, arms crossed satisfactorily over his chest. "Yeah, but how can I resist when you give me such cute responses?" He teased, delighting in the darker blushing he got as an answer.

"Shaddup!" Shiro shouted, throwing a pillow at his grinning King but then all playfulness in the "room" was lost when the Hollow started coughing violently; deep, lung-wracking coughs that anyone could see caused the white form pain.

"Shiro..." Ichigo whispered worriedly, crawling closer across the bed and pulling a now definitely weakened Shiro unresistingly into his lap. He kissed the pale forehead tenderly and brushed frosty hair out of his illicit lover's flushed face with loving concern. He looked up at Kisuke with a pleading expression. "Can you help him, Urahara-san? I don't know if he can go on like this..."

Now, normal people would be appalled by Ichigo and his Hollow's relationship. For one, they were shinigami and Hollow. It was just wrong to most. After that fact, they were both males, another forbidden taboo in more people's eyes and societies. But Urahara Kisuke was not one of those "normal" people. He saw genuine concern and love between them, and species and gender paid no heed to him and he saw this as right.

Kisuke nodded firmly, setting his fan and cane aside and smiled ever so slightly when he saw Ichigo's relieved and thankful expression before he went back to soothing his obviously pained Hollow, who had his golden and obsidian eyes closed as he tried to calm his ragged breathing from his fit of coughing. Just as Kisuke gathered all the materials he thought he would need, his head jerked up when he felt the reiatsu signatures of Kuchiki Rukia and Abarai Renji heading their way.

Ichigo must have felt it as well, even with his poor abilities, and he cursed. "Shit, they can't come over here. I'll go distract them and I'll come back as soon as I can." The orange head decided, reluctantly disentangling himself from his beloved Hollow and resting Shiro gently on his back on the cot. "I'll be back soon, Shi. Urahara-san will help you." He pressed one last kiss to the albino's forehead before he sprinted away to head of his two friends.

Shiro let out a small, almost inaudible whimper when his King left and Kisuke smiled sadly when he saw the devotion the two had for each other. Moving quickly, the ex-captain knelt beside the ill Hollow and ran a foreign reiatsu sensing device over the panting form. His gray eyes glinted with triumph when it picked up some foreign contaminant mixed in forcibly to Shiro's own reitsu. Since it wasn't on the Hollow's body, his regeneration abilities couldn't dispel it and it was making him incredibly weak and wreaking havoc on his spiritual body.

Reaching back for another device, this one containing a set of claw like appendages and a container, Kisuke warned the Hollow before activating it. "This will hurt; please do not try to scream too loudly." And with that grave sentence, he flipped it on and it hummed smoothly in his hands. He almost winced when Shiro's echoing voice screeched out in pain as the instrument forcibly ripped the conflicting reiatsus apart and captured the foreign contaminant in its container.

It was over in barely twenty seconds and Kisuke instantly switched off the machine and the exhausted Hollow slumped back against the cot from where he had arched upwards in agony, panting audibly as a sliver of black was seen between slitted eyes. "F-fuck..." Shiro whispered hoarsely.

The blond shopkeeper nodded grimly. "Yes, I apologize; I tried to make the process less painful but no other attempts at which I tried to were successful so I was forced to make it a painful process. However, it is highly effective and you are now contaminant free and after a few days of recuperating, you should be back up and romping around!" The ex-captain's joyful demeanor returned as Kisuke grinned down at the albino.

Shiro scoffed weakly but his drained reitsu had a thankful feel to it. Kisuke accepted it as the best form of gratitude he was going to get out of the Hollow and was just about to step back when some dark, suspicious marks on the pale throat caught his attention. His smirk widened every passing moment as he saw more half concealed beneath the white shihaksho. Oh ho! Looks like Kurosaki-san was a possessive lover~!

"Ahem, Hollow-san, may I ask you something?" The ex-captain simpered with his expression mostly hidden by his faithful white fan once more. Oh this could be much fun until Ichigo came back after successfully detouring his friends away.

"Eh, wha'?" The albino granted wearily, sitting up with a huff and leaning against the rock wall heavily for support. He was slowly feeling better as his regeneration powers began kicking in now that his body was physically strained and needed reenergizing.

"Is Kurosaki-san rough on you?" Kisuke asked right off the bat and grinned gleefully when the Hollow started so hard he almost fell off the end of the bed with a shocked, embarrassed expression.

"W-wha'?" Shiro spluttered, already blushing a suggestive pink. "Wha' th' hell do ya mean by tha'!" He demanded, highly offended that it was automatically implied that he bottomed in their relationship. Well... NOT THE POINT!

"What I mean," Kisuke answered without skipping a beat. "Is that are those hickey's on your neck or actual bruises from where Kurosaki-san kept you still as he made wild love to you?" He questioned gleefully as those pale cheeks flushed a dark, angry red color from mortification of his words.

"How th' fuck can ya say stuff like tha' so damn easily!" The Hollow shrieked, hands fisting in the sheets of the cot as he glared across the short distance to the pervy shopkeeper. "An' wha' kind of question is tha'? Of course King would never hurt me like tha' purposely!" He blurted out before his eyes widened at what he had just indirectly admitted.

The ex-captain blinked in mock innocence, his triumphant grin hidden by his every trusty fan. "A simple one, Hollow-san. So Kurosaki-san is a gentle lover to you? If that is what you're saying, those are hickeys, and he is obviously possessive of you, but the question still stands if he is normally rough or gentle?" He gleefully decided that making Shiro blush a color close to scarlet was quickly becoming one of his favorite hobbies.

"UP YERS!"

"Oh? But isn't that Kurosaki-san's job? I doubt he would be very happy if I did such a thing."

"AGH! NO DAMMIT! YOU FUCKIN' DIRTY OLD MAN!"

"Now now, Hollow-san, don't strain yourself. You're recuperating remember? And by the darkness of those marks, I say they're fairly recent so you still must be sore."

"AHHHHHH!"

Shiro screamed in mortification and tried to suffocate himself into the cot, his red face a beacon for anyone in miles in any direction. _'King, where are you? Please come back! Don't leave me here with him any longer!' _He wailed quietly in his mind, not noticing his strangely out of character behavior. Normally he would not beg his King for anything, unless forced to... NOT THINKING ABOUT THAT!

"Shiro! You okay?"

Shiro's head shot up in relief when he heard Ichigo's concerned voice, who was running over quickly (alone), having obviously heard the Hollow's scream and was very much worried for his illicit lover.

"King! Thank god yer back! Don' ever leave me alone wit' him again!" The very much scarred, temporarily innocently acting Hollow leaped off the cot and bowled the orange head over in a ferocious hug, whimpering as Kisuke giggled behind him, amused by the intense reaction.

Ichigo's face was one of complete shock even as he soothed his Hollow by petting his white hair gently and stroking down the strong back soothingly. He looked up at Kisuke questioningly. "What did you do?" He demanded, his tone cross between curious and anger.

The blond shopkeeper merely grinned and shrugged. "I pulled a foreign contaminant out of his reitsu that was making him sick and the device I used to do so is the reason for the temporary over exuberance he is displaying now. It is an after affect I could not pull out of the equation when I created it. I then asked him a couple of simple, innocent questions that he hence overreacted over and voila~! You have what is in your arms now!" He explained, white fan waving dramatically at the cowering Shiro. The Hollow was sure to be even more mortified when he remembered his actions later when the after affect wore off.

The substitute shinigami sent a deadpan, disbelieving expression up at him. "You knew he was going to overreact because of an after affect and then you asked him some pervy questions." Ichigo concluded with rising irritation at the mock surprised ex-captain.

"What? I would never! So much distrust in me, Kurosaki-san!"

"Uh huh, sure. Whatever, anyways, he seems much better now, thanks for that Urahara-san. We'll be going now." Ichigo rolled his eyes and gently picked his hiding Hollow up in his arms bridal style once more, Shiro not protesting for once as his mind was still to mortified by the questions Kisuke had asked him to protest being carried like that.

"Come back anytime~!"

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_xD well that was fun~! xD not exactly the best ending but its okay I guess. please review~! ^^_


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